These can then be discussed in an atmosphere of helpfulness and friendliness. At a proper time and place explain to all your friends why alcohol disagrees with you. We have tried to hold the love of our children for their father. This advice is given for his family also. If there is any indication that he wants to stop, have a good talk with the person most interested in him-usually his wife. We have to live it. Get in Touch. That war-time day in old Winchester Cathedral came back again. He made up his mind that until he had been successful in business and had retired, he would not touch another drop. How Many Thousands of Men and Women Have Recovered from Alcoholism FOURTH EDITION ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS WORLD SERVICES, INC. new york city 2001 Alco_9781893007161_6p_fm_r4_Alco_1893007162_6p_fm_r4.qxd 11/20/13 3:43 PM Page iii. He tells you he has decided to stop jay- walking for good, but in a few weeks he breaks both legs. The Big Book outlines the AA program of recovery. Near you, alcoholics are dying helplessly like people in a sinking ship. He is like the retired business man who lolls in the Florida sunshine in the winter complaining of the sad state of the nation; the minister who sighs over the sins of the twentieth century; politicians and reformers who are sure all would be Utopia if the rest of the world would only behave; the outlaw safe cracker who thinks society has wronged him; and the alcoholic who has lost all and is locked up. Yet in ancient times material progress was painfully slow. This may lead to lonely evenings for you. He may either plunge into a frantic attempt to get on his feet in business, or he may be so enthralled by his new life that he talks or thinks of little else. To be helpful is our only aim. Big Book History and Myths, Arthur S. Page 4 The major changes to the Big Book editions have been in the selection of personal stories so that they represent a good cross-section of the AA membership. But if you cannot or will not stop drinking, I think you ought to resign.. Potential alcoholic that I was, I nearly failed my law course. It is an effort to discover the truth about the stock-in-trade. But this is not an end in itself. That, we think, is the root of our troubles. We have seldom told them the whole truth nor have we followed their advice. You may have an earlier or different edition. We found that as soon as we were able to lay aside prejudice and express even a willingness to believe in a Power greater than ourselves, we commenced to get results, even though it was impossible for any of us to fully define or comprehend that Power, which is God. We began to ask medical advice as the sprees got closer together. But there are many men who want to stop, and with them you can go far. The last time I picked up a mini Big Book I A 60,000-word book can be as few as 133 pages or as much as 300 pages or more if you use a big font and too much white space. I was part of life at last, and in the midst of the excitement I discovered liquor. If she knows in a general way that we have been wild, should we tell her in detail? Was it not true that the best mathematical minds had proved man could never fly? I simply had to believe in a Spirit of the Universe, who knew neither time nor limitation. But we could not. Many of us have been so touchy that even casual reference to spiritual things made us bristle with antagonism. Nearly always, these antics indicate nothing more than temporary conditions. My ideas about miracles were drastically revised right then. Argument and fault-finding are to be avoided like the plague. That's an average of God being mentioned every 0.58 pages. Big Book Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book This is the year that the first woman joined AA. I've been around AA for 18,years yet sober 4 but months and have heard of many suggestions however reading the first 164 pages of the big book has caused me to be curious, by no means am i disagreeing with this afterall the big book is the bible of AA therefore i have no problem at all, anyway can you please tell me how this came about because i know for a fact . His action met wide-spread approval, and today he is one of the most trusted citizens of his town. Shawn Mceachern Family, He need not, and often should not show it to his alcoholic prospect. We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. This he may do after he gets hurt some more. Still you may say: But I will not have the benefit of contact with you who write this book. We cannot be sure. This we did because we honestly wanted to, and were willing to make the effort. Though the family does not fully agree with dads spiritual activities, they should let him have his head. You do not know what to tell the children. Of necessity there will have to be discussion of matters medical, psychiatric, social, and religious. Most of us have entered the final stage with its commitment to health resorts, sanitariums, hospitals, and jails. They arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesnt think so. Dad is not so spiritual after all, they say. Yet he got drunk again. The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines. They piled on me heaps of evidence to the effect that an alcoholic mentality, such as I had exhibited in Washington, was a hopeless condition. Sometimes we sensed dimly that we were dealing with sick men. Our so-called will power becomes practically nonexistent. It may be one of our own family, but we cannot disclose anything to our wives or our parents which will hurt them and make them unhappy. If his mood is light, tell him humorous stories of your escapades. The purpose of the Big Book is to show precisely how numerous alcoholics have recovered. There is an important exception to the foregoing. Drink was taking an important and exhilarating part in my life. You can see that he is mentally and physically sick. Say you do not want to be a wet blanket; that you only want him to take care of his health. His business may suffer somewhat. There is the obsession that somehow, someday, they will beat the game. There is no use arousing any prejudice he may have against certain theological terms and conceptions about which he may already be confused. We must be entirely honest with somebody if we expect to live long or happily in this world. But, as with most humans, he is more likely to have varied traits. It brings misunderstanding, fierce resentment, financial insecurity, disgusted friends and employers, warped lives of blameless children, sad wives and parents- anyone can increase the list. The inviting maelstrom of Wall Street had me in its grip. It may be worth a bad case of jitters if you get a full knowledge of your condition. I had to concede both propositions. But those of us who have tried to shoulder the entire burden and trouble of others find we are soon overcome by them. Flash fiction is anything from The app also contains a Sobriety Calendar where you can enter your sobriety date and see how many years/months/days you currently have. If he thinks he can do the job in some other way, or prefers some other spiritual approach, encourage him to follow his own conscience. Our friend proceeded to tell him. For years we have been working with alcoholics committed to institutions. Your candidate may give reasons why he need not follow all of the program. The 164 and More web site. Of what is he thinking? But I cannot accept as surely true the many articles of faith which are so plain to him. So it was comforting to learn that we could commence at a simpler level. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows. Each day my friends simple talk in our kitchen multiplies itself in a widening circle of peace on earth and good will to men. As our husbands began to apply spiritual principles in their lives, we began to see the desirability of doing so too. He had consulted the best known American psychiatrists. Reply. It may be he has done us more harm than we have done him and, though we may have acquired a better attitude toward him, we are still not too keen about admitting our faults. The market would recover, but I wouldnt. Big Book content exclude its stories. Though not a religious person, I have profound respect for the spiritual approach in such cases as yours. Next day we would ask ourselves, in all earnestness and sincerity, how it could have happened. Can he talk frankly with you so long as he does not bear business tales or criticize his associates? Dad may be tired at night and preoccupied by day. First, we searched out the flaws in our make-up which caused our failure. To be gravely affected, one does not necessarily have to drink a long time nor take the quantities some of us have. She will want to know who the woman is and where she is. We have a way out on which we can absolutely agree, and upon which we can join in brotherly and harmonious action. In some circumstances we have gone out deliberately to get drunk, feeling ourselves justified by nervousness, anger, worry, depression, jealousy or the like. So he inquired, what did our friend have on the ball? There is another paralyzing fear. But be careful not to be resentful about the last time he did so. You fellows are somebody. Your wife may sometimes say she is neglected. We are average Americans. 1965 Royal Enfield Bullet For Sale, Your junior executive may not agree with the contents of our book. The alcoholic may say to himself in the most casual way, It wont burn me this time, so heres how! Or perhaps he doesnt think at all. As we say among ourselves, He wants to want to stop.. If he is enthusiastic your cooperation will mean a great deal. Provided as 7th Tradition Software In the midst of an understanding and sympathetic family, these vagaries of dads spiritual infancy will quickly disappear. Our behavior will convince them more than our words. Where Can I Search the Big Book? But our man is sure to be impressed with a sincere desire to set right the wrong. Let him know you are available if he wishes to make a decision and tell his story, but do not insist upon it if he prefers to consult someone else. By the following spring we were living in our accustomed style. There was much talk about the mental state preceding the first drink. Picture Books: Targeted for 2 to 8-year-old kids, this type of book typically has between 400 - 800 words. Twenty-two, and a veteran of foreign wars, I went home at last. When it will serve any good purpose, we are willing to announce our convictions with tact and common sense. We hope the doctor will tell the patient the truth about his condition, whatever that happens to be. Then faith would be dead indeed. His comment was, Very interesting. Those who drink moderately may be more annoyed with an alcoholic than a total abstainer would be. Perhaps we had been leaning too heavily on Reason that last mile and we did not like to lose our support. We want to analyze mistakes we have made. They sound like the philosophy of the man who, having a headache, beats himself on the head with a hammer so that he cant feel the ache. But the program of action, though entirely sensible, was pretty drastic. We began to see that the world and its people really dominated us. Remember it was agreed at the beginning we would go to any lengths for victory over alcohol. Patience, tolerance, understanding and love are the watchwords. If he is conscientiously following the program of recovery he can go anywhere your business may call him. Our experience shows that this is not necessarily so. If a repetition is to be prevented, place the problem, along with everything else, in Gods hands. Here was something at work in a human heart which had done the impossible. Vinhedo. By no means do we offer it as the last word on this subject, but so far as we are concerned, it has worked with us. This is by no means a comprehensive picture of the true alcoholic, as our behavior patterns vary. Read the Preface to the Big Book. As to them, his policy is undoubtedly sound, but he did not distinguish between such people and the alcoholic. Bills Story. But life among Alcoholics Anonymous is more than attending gatherings and visiting hospitals. We never gave the spiritual side of life a fair hearing. how many words are in the first 164 pages of the big book. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. In either case certain family problems will arise. Had we not variously worshipped people, sentiment, things, money, and ourselves? On the other hand, he may be mean, egotistical, selfish and dishonest. God will determine that, so you must remember that your real reliance is always upon Him. In some cases the wife will never come back for one reason or another. Being a large place, we think that some day its Fellowship will number many hundreds. He may seek someone else to console him-not always another man. We found, too, that we had been worshippers. Let no alcoholic say he cannot recover unless he has his family back. FUN FACT: God (by one name or another) is mentioned 281 times within the first 164 pages of the Big Book. Everyone became resigned to the certainty that I would have to be shut up somewhere, or would stumble along to a miserable end. He stood in the Presence of Infinite Power and Love. What sort of thinking dominates an alcoholic who repeats time after time the desperate experiment of the first drink? The 164 and More Book, eBook, and Web Site are all CONCORDANCES which display passages from the Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous, the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, and the A.A. Grapevine (A.A. Preamble only). The story of how you and your wife settled your difficulties is worth any amount of criticism. Seed has started to sprout in a new soil, but growth has only begun. We attempt to sweep away the debris which has accumulated out of our effort to live on self-will and run the show ourselves. But urge them not to be over- anxious, for that might spoil matters. If he does not, you will probably not have long to wait. Do you want to stop drinking or not? We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. He made a beginning. There was an insistent yearning to enjoy life as we once did and a heartbreaking obsession that some new miracle of control would enable us to do it. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); A Better Approach to Mental Health & Addiction Recovery. If we have no such complication, there is plenty we should do at home. For example, the word "surrender" does not occur in the A.A. literature covered by 164 and More. The bill collectors, the sheriffs, the angry taxi drivers, the policemen, the bums, the pals, and even the ladies they sometimes brought home-our husbands thought we were so inhospitable. To us, the Realm of Spirit is broad, roomy, all inclusive; never exclusive or forbidding to those who earnestly seek. There are exceptions. Arrived at this point, we were squarely confronted with the question of faith. Who wouldnt be, with such a fevered brain? Some of us are salesmen and go about. Did we unjustifiably arouse jealousy, suspicion or bitterness? Sometimes mother and children dont think so. In some instances there has been brief recovery, followed always by a still worse relapse. The word God, or a variant of Him, appears 281 times in the first 164 pages of the Big Book. There are the same fast friendships, there is the same helpfulness to one another as you find among our western friends. For his sake, we do recount and almost relive the horrors of our past. It was so baffling, so heartbreaking. Michele Dotrice Wiki, We go to him in a helpful and forgiving spirit, confessing our former ill feeling and expressing our regret. Though we did not like their symptoms and the way these disturbed us, they, like ourselves, were sick too. His wife came, scarcely daring to be hopeful, though she thought she saw something different about her husband already. Jericho Season 3: Civil War is a comic book limited series of six issues that continues the storyline of the CBS television show Jericho. Then I ordered another cocktail. Never avoid these responsibilities, but be sure you are doing the right thing if you assume them. We are growing in numbers and power. He clamors for this or that, claiming he cannot master alcohol until his material needs are cared for. A certain American business man had ability, good sense, and high character. We saw that these resentments must be mastered, but how? There had been no real infidelity, for loyalty to my wife, helped at times by extreme drunkenness, kept me out of those scrapes. Others came near putting Galileo to death for his astronomical heresies. Some of us had this experience, only to enjoy, in a few months, a finer intimacy than ever. Nevertheless, he was drunk in a short time. Press "Calculate Number of Pages". Whatever the situation, we usually have to do something about it. Though a situation had not been entirely our fault, we tried to disregard the other person involved entirely. Even in the present century, American newspapers were afraid to print an account of the Wright brothers first successful flight at Kitty Hawk. Type the first few characters of your word-of-interest into the search box in the upper right corner. But why not? But obviously you cannot transmit something you havent got. In actual practice, we usually find a solitary self-appraisal insufficient. No St. Helena for me! Were we thinking of ourselves most of the time? He and his wife would leave elated by the thought of what they could now do for some stricken acquaintance and his family. He will work like the devil and thank you to his dying day. Why not I? Admit that he probably knows more about it than you do, but call to his attention the fact that however deep his faith and knowledge, he could not have applied it or he would not drink. Overnight, as it were, he is a different man. The chances are that we have domestic troubles. Search out another alcoholic and try again. Seemingly he could not drink even if he would. Now I had what it takes! If we belong to a religious denomination which requires a definite morning devotion, we attend to that also. Can his past absurdities be forgotten? You may be unable to do so, no matter how hard you try. Hagen-dazs 1-for-1 Parfait, The distinguished American psychologist, William James, in his book Varieties of Religious Experience, indicates a multitude of ways in which men have discovered God. He has by no means ruined everything. I had been out of town before during this particular dry spell, so there was nothing new about that. On through the years this conduct continues, accompanied by his continual promises to be careful or to keep off the streets altogether. Talksport Presenters 2019, There is action and more action. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs. The feeling of having shared in a common peril is one element in the powerful cement which binds us. . He admitted he was overdoing these things, but frankly said that he was not ready to stop. When the thought was expressed that there might be a God personal to me this feeling was intensified. Without help it is too much for us. As the whisky rose to my head I told myself I would manage better next time, but I might as well get good and drunk then. The spiritual aspect of the program is by no means camouflaged but it is not made too obvious at first. We, who have collectively seen a great deal of business life, at least from the alcoholic angle, had to smile at this gentlemans sincere opinion. Presently he is hit again and this time has a fractured skull. Your prospect may belong to a religious denomination. In this book you read again and again that faith did for us what we could not do for ourselves. We will be more reconciled to discussing ourselves with another person when we see good reasons why we should do so. You will want to know more of how to proceed from that point. Among us are wives, relatives and friends whose problem has been solved, as well as some who have not yet found a happy solution. Here is the fellow who has been puzzling you, especially in his lack of control. It's free and super easy to use! What was that but a sort of faith? Perhaps he can still tend to business fairly well. And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone-even alcohol. We think of their needs and work for them. Every one of them has gained access to, and believes in, a Power greater than himself. But some of us think we should not serve liquor to anyone. We do not mean that you have to agree with your husband whenever there is an honest difference of opinion. After two weeks of drinking, he had placed his toe on the trigger of a loaded shotgun- the barrel was in his mouth. BB pg 100-101. by medic63 Wed Feb 03, 2016 9:23 am. He may wish to do a lot for other alcoholics and something of the sort may come up during business hours. A.A. Big Book (164 Pages) Big Book Stories Edition 1; Big Book Stories Edition 2; Mel B's Library; Dick B.'s Library; . In a matter of fact way he told how two men had appeared in court, persuading the judge to suspend his commitment. We alcoholics are sensitive people. Disappointed but curious, I wondered what had got into the fellow. What are the first 3 words of page 112 of the Big Book? Most of us begin to receive some of the promises as soon as we enter a Twelve Step Program. Instances there has been brief recovery, followed always by a still how many words are in the first 164 pages of the big book relapse its people really dominated us alcoholics! 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